Writing and Being a Writer

I’m exceedingly glad that I chose not to do any writing challenges this month.  I would’ve been totally shit at it.  That’s not to say that I’m not writing.  I’m just not writing here.

So, where am I writing?  I’ve been writing for Parachute, Mapquest‘s blog. Oh, and I get paid for it.  I know, right?  A life-long dream of being a paid writer.  Oh, I may have secretly deep-down half-whispered to myself that I was a writer…but only in the middle of the night and when the moon was full.

But never out loud.

Or to other people.

Or to f’ing Facebook for that matter.

It wasn’t that I’m ashamed to say that I’m a writer but whenever someone declares that they are a writer, the other person inevitably says, that’s cool.  Can I read something that you’ve written?  And then the other person just sputters because there’s nothing the writer feels comfortable sharing with the other person because it’s in the process of revision.

But maybe that’s just me.

It’s probably just me.

I’ve had several friends ask me how I got into freelancing.

To be honest?  I jumped right in, not thinking about the ramifications Ramifications being rejections or in this case, acceptance.  Acceptance?! Do I even know what the word means?  I mean, it’s taken me almost 39 years to accept that I am a writer – out loud, no doubt – but to be accepted?

Yeah, no low self-esteem issues on this girl, thanks.

Anyway, I’m still reeling from September’s Story-a-Day Challenge and my mother’s cancer diagnosis.  Getting up to take my two-mile walk in the mornings is a challenge – not to mention that it’s still dark at 6:00 am and really remains so until 7:00 am.  Coming to work is a challenge; I love what I do.  I really, really do.  The people are awesome and I’m helping people.  The question is, is this what I want to do for the rest of my life?

I’m sure we all know the answer to that question.

(It’s no, by the way.)

Being present is a challenge.  My mind goes wandering and won’t come back for a while.  I can’t be the best _____ if I’m not present and in-the-moment.  By the way the _____ isn’t an indication of what I do for a living; it’s an indication of whatever I’m doing right now.

Anyway, writing and being a writer.  My husband is proud of me; proud that I’m putting myself out there (even if for little pockets of time).  I wouldn’t have applied to do freelance writing a year ago.  It wouldn’t have entered my mind.

So, what’s the point of this post?

I’m proud to (finally) call myself a writer.  I hope you are too.

[End note:  How long has the new wordpress layout been like this?  And when I mean “like this,” I mean the posting options.  It’s changed and I’m not sure if I like it yet.  *shrugs*]


One thought on “Writing and Being a Writer

  1. It’s not just you. It took me a long time to say I’m a writer – still not entirely comfortable with it, even after publication. I still don’t say it much to people I know. As you say, either I’ll be uncomfortable giving them what I’ve written or they’ll be uncomfortable if they don’t like it. Though it does sometimes work out OK, thankfully.

    Liked by 1 person

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